Self Image Secrets, How You See Yourself Is Everything: Rebecca Collins

“I was always looking outside of myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within. It is there all the time.” —Anne Freud, British Psychoanalyst 

You’re not only capable of achieving your dreams, you deserve to achieve them! 

Are you held back by the nagging feeling that you’re just not good enough? Not experienced enough for the job you want, beautiful enough for the romantic relationships you desire, funny enough to captivate an audience at a dinner party? These are the standard stories we tell ourselves. 

Often, the way we see ourselves is a warped, distorted version of how the rest of the world sees us. We convince ourselves we are lacking, which holds us back from reaching into our full potential and seizing the opportunities we deserve. 

Self Image, The Truth

The truth is, you’re so much more colorful and magnificent than you think you are!

You might have spent hours of your life worrying about what other people think of you. “He probably thinks I’m completely stupid.”, “I definitely made a fool out of myself last night…,” etc., etc. Let’s be honest; we’ve all been there. But in reality, the likelihood is that no one is expending energy on judging you, and if they are, they’re simply not the kind of people you want in your life. 

Ultimately, you can’t control how other people see you (as much as you wish you could) but what you can control is how you see yourself. If you begin to tell yourself again and again that you are powerful, valuable, intelligent, worthy, and capable, then it will eventually become your truth. 

Try this: 

Practice actually saying the words ‘I like myself’ and ‘I’m happy to be me’ out loud. It might feel awkward or silly at first, but push through. Over time, getting used to saying and hearing these words will help your positive self-talk to override the voice of your inner critic. 

Just imagine if you truly saw how valuable and powerful you are, how worthy you are of all the happiness and joy that comes your way – your life would transform. You would be unstoppable! 

It’s simple really: see yourself as amazing, and the world can’t help but see you as amazing too. 

YOUR LOVEABLE QUALITIES 

Now it’s time to look inwards and find your most loveable qualities. What makes you a wonderful force in the world? What do you love about being you? If you’re struggling with this one, try thinking about what your best friends say they love about you. Perhaps you are an excellent listener, or you make people laugh. Think about the 10 things you value in yourself and write them down. 

Remind yourself of these qualities when you hear the voice of self-doubt rising up. Every time you feel down, remember these loveable truths and change your negative mood into feel-good energy. 

A tip on body language: 

You’d be surprised how powerful your body language can be in promoting self-confidence. Even if you’re feeling insecure and all you want to do is curl up in bed and hide from the world, try these simple tweaks and you will feel a difference: 

1. Stand up straight with your shoulders back. 

2. Make eye contact with people. 

3. Smile! 

Making seemingly small adjustments to how you hold yourself will do wonders for how the world receives you, and will feed back into how you see yourself. 

Remember, you are going to be you forever. Your relationship with yourself is the most important one you are ever going to have – everything in life follows on from this. So focus on all of your good points and love yourself for who you are! 

Stop the self-loathing: 

Two of the most common ways we drag ourselves down are by

1) Comparing ourselves to others. 

2) Punishing ourselves for our failures.

It’s time to break these patterns, which do nothing but inhibit you from experiencing life and all of the wonderful gifts it can bring you. 

1) When you find yourself in the poisonous loop of comparison, tell yourself that you are you, you will only ever be you, and you are perfect. You are a unique individual who has never existed before and will never exist again. Remind yourself of the loveable qualities you wrote down – these are the things that make you a force for good on earth. Shout them out loud! 

2) We’re all pretty good at punishing ourselves for ‘failing’. Embrace the opportunity to learn from your mistakes and see them as a gift. Instead of berating yourself, learn to celebrate your achievements and drown out the voice of negativity. 

Rebecca..

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