Guest Post: Rebecca Collins
“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” —Alice Walker, author of The Color Purple
You have the power!
The power to be successful, happy, fulfilled, and free to live your life as you want.
Maybe you don’t feel like that though. You might be stuck in a negative cycle, trapped in an unhappy relationship, or feel unable to achieve your dreams. In reality, you have lost sight of how powerful you really are and it’s time to reclaim that back.
We all have inner strengths, many of which we don’t give ourselves credit for. Most of the time, we are too busy beating ourselves up for mistakes or failures and forget to practise self-love. We even tell ourselves that we don’t deserve to be loved and often rely on others to validate our worth instead.
Does that sound familiar?
You may feel so ordinary that you aren’t even aware of your strengths, or maybe someone influential in your life like a parent or teacher focused way too much on your weaknesses in the past. The truth is, that you can be successful in all areas of your life once you identify and build on your inner strengths, no matter what anyone else says or thinks.
When you hand power for your life over to someone else, you are forgetting how strong you are and will end up feeling worthless and unfulfilled. These feelings thrive on negativity so the sooner you get rid of them, the better.
I want you to watch out for those moments in your life when you do any of the following:
- Listen to critical thoughts that make you feel worthless.
- Find yourself saying yes, when you really want to say no.
- Don’t pay attention to your own feelings and needs.
- Adopt harmful habits such as alcohol abuse or lack of exercise.
- Don’t praise yourself or feel proud of your accomplishments.
- Feel like you are constantly giving without receiving anything in return.
- Don’t spend any time doing the things you love.
When I talk about power, I mean recognizing your strengths, embracing your positive qualities, and being able to flourish in life on your own terms. You can do this and, to be honest, no one else is better qualified!
The way to get your power back is by rediscovering your inner strengths. These may have gotten buried under a pile of bad experiences, hard-knocks, or negative self-talk over time. But if you dig a little bit beneath the surface, you will find them. No matter what others say or how they treat you, YOU are amazing and it’s time to remind yourself of that.
FIND YOUR FIVE CORE STRENGTHS
I want you to think about your 5 core strengths now. What are you good at? What makes you unique? I’ve added one example to get you started and I want you to add five more of your own. You may want to mention things like honesty, fairness, a sense of humor, or any other quality that you feel describes the authentic you.
YOUR 5 STRENGTHS
Example: I’m kind and loving.
When you rediscover your 5 core strengths, you will also find that you can begin to face life with greater energy and vitality. If you feel weak and unsure of your capabilities, every small hurdle on your way will seem like a mountain. If that’s the case, you are much more likely to give up and fail to live your life to the fullest. Knowing that you are strong and capable gives you limitless positive energy to chase your dreams and enjoy your life to the fullest.
Rediscovering your inner strengths doesnt mean that you will be happy all the time or that you will never fail, but you will have the resilience to bounce back each time harder, better, stronger.
STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF
How do you stay true to yourself once you have rediscovered your strengths? The way to restore your self-worth, and to realize your potential is by using your strengths as your guide. Acknowledge who you are and be the best possible version of yourself.
Here’s how to do just that:
- Listen to your authentic needs, desires, and wants.
- Support your feelings without judgment.
- Reclaim your worth by doing things that you are good at.
- Surround yourself with people who love you as you are.
- Get out more and adopt healthy practices for mind, body and soul.
- Set goals and have a vision for your future.
- Tell yourself you are strong.
By believing in your abilities and relying on your strengths, it will be easier for you to live a happier, fuller life. It won’t happen overnight, but the more you practise, the more self-assured you will become.
When I feel self-doubt creeping in, I practise this one simple exercise:
- I find somewhere quiet where I won’t be disturbed (that could be the office, or even in the bathroom…).
- I close my eyes and bring my awareness inside, focusing on my breathing.
- I begin breathing in and out slowly for a few minutes until my mind and body start to relax.
- I connect with the power within me by imagining my breath flowing through my whole body and energizing every cell.
- I focus on my 5 key strengths – the ones that are core to me. I choose my resilience, talent, honesty, patience, and abilities.
- I say to myself, “I am strong.”
- I open my eyes, shake off that self-doubt, and embrace my power.
You can do this anytime you need to. Go inside yourself and pull out those strengths you listed above. Keep them firmly in your mind and don’t let anyone take them away – they belong to you!
I hope you have enjoyed this post and feel more empowered after reading it. Remember to focus on your 5 core strengths and reject negative experiences that make you doubt yourself. Use your strengths to guide you as you embark on your most wonderful life!
In next week’s post, I’ll be talking about how to regain your confidence and achieve your goals, no matter what they are. Until then, take care and remember to love yourself deeply!