KeithI have spoken to several people in the last year or two who feel “stuck”. I think the reason people come to me about this is because of a YouTube video I did a few years back. It seemed to resonate with several people.
People often feel stuck for several reasons, boredom being one. They see every day as the same and often feel like they are on a hamster wheel living every day on repeat. It doesn’t have to be this way. We often feel trapped and stuck in inertia, often feeling like there is no hope. This is a mind-trick we tell ourselves. Actually, the opposite is quite true.
No one is stuck, it’s your mind telling you that you’re stuck. Change your mind, you’ll change your outcome.
There are a few steps anyone can take to give their current life a complete overhaul and it needn’t mean distancing yourself from your current tribe or family.. My only advice regarding the people you see or hear from on a regular basis would be, make sure they are an asset. Choose people who build you up, don’t hang around with people who’s default setting is negative, they will bring you down and make you falsely believe that it’s all hopeless.
It’s not
Let’s get started:
Step 1. Focus.
The chances are if you asked 100 people what they really want, 99 of them would probably give you some kind of vague answer. Think for a moment. What do you love doing?, could you make a living from it?. What could you do everyday that you could get to love and make a living from ?
The reason I ask this question is because people have to work in order to pay bills, but what you work at is a choice. You are not your job, you are just turning up each day and getting on with it. Why would you spend nearly half of your entire life doing something you don’t like?
Maybe you love your job. I had a job like that once. But in a recent survey, 60% of people interviewed said they felt disengaged from their jobs and 19% said they were downright miserable. Imagine carrying that burden through 50 years of work?
So, I’ll ask you again. What would you do if you could?, what would you do and could you make a living from it?. If you answered yes to the second part of that question, why are you not doing it?
Focus on the answer. Spend time figuring out what you really want. This is half the solution to being stuck. When you have a belly full of fire and every day excites you, you’ll never be stuck again. The other half of that solution is to go do it. We’ll talk more about that in the next section.
Be precise, write it all down, leave nothing out. Get used to using a pen or pencil, this is far better than typing on your laptop or iPad as Handwriting forces your brain to mentally engage with the information, improving both literacy and reading comprehension.
BAM… onto step 2.
Step 2. Create a Plan
OK, this is the fun part. Now you know exactly what you want, draw up a plan to get it. I can confidently tell you right here right now, if you really want something bad enough (not just a wish), you can and you will have it. How do I know this?, personal experience. Everything I really wished for never happened but everything I made happen, happened because I wasn’t going to let it get away.
Relentless Pursuit is the name of the game…
People come up with the lamest of excuses just to protect their fragile egos as to why they don’t have what they want, excuses such as:
“Life gets in the way” – Really?, you’re the pilot, create a different one
“I’m too busy” – Too busy?, you definitely need to change track. There are a lot of busy people, busyness does not always equate to being productive. You can be busy easing donuts and sloshing down beer on the sofa.
“I’ve no money” – YES you have. You have a load of crap in your house that you’ve been keeping for eternity, turn it into hard cash. P.S most internet based businesses require very little start up capital. If you don’t have $500 for an internet startup what have you been doing with your money for the last 20yrs?
“My wife won’t let me” – LOL.. grow some ba**s
And too many more to mention.
Look, people don’t think twice about getting a divorce if their relationship dies, people will buy security for their house if it’s just been burgled and people will redecorate their houses if they’ve just been flooded.
Because they have too.
And herein lies the rub.
People tend to only change when it’s forced upon them.
Create a plan, the internet is awash with ideas, watch several youtube videos, read books on your subject, join facebook groups etc, etc. Change takes time but you can do an awful lot in 6 months if you really want to. The time will pass anyway.
Step 3. Ignore most people.
This is my favourite.
It’s my favourite because most “experts” especially on the Internet show you what “they’ve” done and how they got to where they are today. There’s nothing wrong with that but it’s only a guide. It doesn’t mean you will do the same, you might, but remember they’ve been doing it a while. The best way for you to find out how to do something is for you to go do it…. now.
Yes, starting seems to be one of the biggest problems. Nothing happens until you start the process.
Do it unready. Not when everything is perfect and you know x,y,z. you may never do it. I’ll repeat that because if you only take one thing away from this blog post take this away.
Do it unready. Take the first step. Do it until you get it right then take the next step. Your brain will engage with what you’re doing and your subconscious will help you along the way. Nothing good comes from inertia. Action wins above everything. You won’t get rich reading books or doing courses, but you can get rich by implementing what you learn.
Learn a bit, do a bit, take the next step and keep taking steps. Eventually, you’ll get it right.
There is only one person alive today that has 100% of your interests at heart, and that is you. People live by the rule WIIFM, what’s in it for me, even though they protest that they don’t. We have to put ourselves first in most cases as we alone are responsible for looking after our body and mind.
That’s not to say others don’t have your interests at heart. Of course they do, but no one does you quite like you.
The reason I say this is because not everyone will be happy for you when you do change. A lot of people, close friends and even family may on the one hand be cheering you on but silently hoping you stay as you are. People may be afraid of losing you. No one will lose you, the cream of your friends will rise to the top and family will always be family.
Just keep going. Ignore the naysayers. In order to rise at anything, you have to put yourself out there and be counted. Life is hard, change is hard, choose your hard. Take your advice from people who are doing what you want to do. Be around people who want you to win.
Always remember, when you win, others win too. Peope love being around successful people as success rubs off on to others.
Final Step. Be prepared to walk into the unknown
When you break free from “crowd thinking” you set yourself up for criticism and sometimes ridicule. Many famous people were told they were wasting their time. If they had listened to toxic friends and even toxic family members they wouldn’t be living the life they are now. Change requires guts, it requires being bold and doing things that will be uncomfortable at times.
Go “All In”. If you’re going to do something, give it 100%. You will be surprised at what you can achieve if you let go of thinking about what you can’t do and start thinking about what you can do. You can do a lot. Trust me, i’m finding that out every day.
Have a great day
Let me know in the comments what you thought about this post
Keith
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